Tomorrow I’m starting the master cleanse. It’s not really sinking in yet that I’m really going to do it. I learned about this from my friend and I thought she was crazy for thinking about doing it, and after our numerous talks about it, I was convinced. I had to do it too. So, now Im writing down what I expect from this. I know it’s going to be really hard. I’m so addicted to food it’s crazy. Chocolates, juice, and BACON, but I guess I’m now making the decision to break that addiction.
I’ve never had a healthy relationship with food. That would seem absurd since I had vegetarian parents and did not try meat till I was 15 years old. But, when I was little I would eat TONS of candy and ice cream. My neighbors had a candy store and I would steal change out of this huge change jar my mom tried to hide and buy 50-100 frooties everyday. I would eat them, all of them. My parents also loved ice cream and my favorite was chocolate chip. This was also my daddy’s favorite too so we had it all the time. At night, I would take a spoon and dig out some and eat it in my room. I dug it out 2-3 times a night. I would hide the spoon under my bed and get a new spoon everyday until my mom would say, “where are all of my spoons.” Shortly after that she started buying ice cream with nuts because I hate nuts. But that didn’t stop me. I would ride my bike to the baskin robbins around the corner and buy a pint and eat it all in a day in a half. Meanwhile, I was still eating all the candy I bought. It made me happy.
Now its not like anything traumatic was happening to me at home. I was the baby of the family. My brothers had moved out and I was lonely. There wasn’t really anyone to talk to and when I was eating stuff like that I was comforted. I continued like that until junior year in high school. I started getting tired of the taste of it. A friend convinced me to join the tennis team and then started a step team. I also went on a protest against my parents and refused to eat at home so I only had one meal a day, which was lunch at school. I lost 20-30 lbs and I looked great.
By the time prom came around Senior year I got tons of attention from guys. That helped fill the void. My self-esteem was wrapped up in how many guys I could have wrapped around my finger. I then came to college. Then the problem with food reappeared with a vengeance. I would go to dining halls and eat meals for two or three people. Then I would get my weakness, ice cream, every night with oreos and chocolate syrup. I also got in a serious committed relationship, so there were no more guys hanging on my every word, begging to be with me.
I turned back to the one thing that gave me comfort, food. And almost subconsciously devoured food like it was nothing. I had gained almost 40 lbs by the end of my freshman year in college. So now I am doing the master cleanse to break this addiction. To learn self control. I also want to be sexy for my bf. I know the weight gain was surprising to him and I owe it to him to be who I was when he fell in love with me but healthier and more food conscious. So after this cleanse I want to be
1. 15 lbs lighter
2. able to control myself around food
3. gain true self-worth and self-confidence
4. show my bf that I am his ideal woman in all aspects
COMPUTER SCREEN,EYES GLUED.. I ENJOY THE FUNNER THINGS NIGGAS WITH NO TUMBLR ACT LIKE TUMBLR ISN’T EVERYTHING IM HAVING A GOOD TIME FACEBOOKERS TRYNA RUIN IT SHOUT OUT TO THE FACT THAT ALL MY TUMBLR NIGGAS DOING IT ..
“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”—Bob Marley (via explicitbeauty)
I want a girl that's chill as hell. Nahh, I don't care if she smokes that doesn't matter at all. I just wanna lay my head in her lap an have her run her fingers through my hair while we watch Toy Story an eat cookie dough :)
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn’t have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The cashier said, “I’m sorry, but you don’t have enough money to buy this doll.” Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ”Granny, are you sure I don’t have enough money?” The old lady replied: ”You know that you don’t have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.” Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. “It’s the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.” I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. “No, Santa Claus can’t bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.” His eyes were so sad while saying this. “My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.” My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: “I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.” Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me “I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won’t forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn’t have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.” Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. “Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?” “OK,” he said, “I hope I do have enough.” I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: “Thank you God for giving me enough money!” Then he looked at me and added, “I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!” “I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn’t dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.” “My mommy loves white roses.” A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn’t get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn’t stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart